


What Degree Of Shambles

by balloonwhisk



Series: The Only Thing That Makes Sense [3]
Category: The Bright Sessions (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, short coda for 48 - Mark, some mention of Rose/Emily and Damien/Mark though again it's not the focus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-08
Updated: 2018-02-08
Packaged: 2019-03-15 13:48:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13614642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/balloonwhisk/pseuds/balloonwhisk
Summary: Rose gives Damien a ride to the bus station.





	What Degree Of Shambles

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is also unbetaed. Rose just wouldn't leave me alone though I can't seem to convince her to actually be friends with Damien. English is not my first language so there's probably some mistakes. Please let me know if you see any. Anyway, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy!
> 
> The title is from Happy Endings: “And to what degree of shambles would you say your life is in?” which is a question I would love to ask Damien tbh

Rose had just finished placing the bourekas on the rack to cool a bit when her cell phone rang. She wiped her hands on the dish towel slung over her shoulder and picked up.

“Hello?”

“Hey Rose.”

“Damien? Why are you calling me?”

“Are you busy?”

“Kind of.” Rose glanced at all the dirty dishes that had accumulated in her quest make the perfect bourekas and sighed. “What’s up?”

“I need a ride to the bus station.”

Rose frowned. “Now?”

“Whenever you’re free, but today if possible.”

Rose chewed on her bottom lip as she thought about it. She had plans with Emily in the afternoon but now that the baking was done she was free until then. “I guess I can be at your place in an hour.”

“Can you just pick me up from the park?”

“Okay.” said Rose, bewildered. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine. I’ll be at the entrance on 1st.”

“Okay.”

“Thank you.” Damien said, and hung up.

Rose stared at her phone dumbfounded, trying to remember the last time Damien had actually thanked her for anything. _Something must really be wrong_. Maybe Mark had finally talked to him. It had been a week since the meeting at Sam’s, after all. And if he was heading to the bus station… She knew that she should stay away from Damien, that going to his house was high up there in the list of stupid things she’d done. She was lucky that Aaron hadn’t been around enough to figure it out because then her whole family would be involved and she really wasn’t up to facing the grueling interrogation that would undoubtedly follow. She knew all that, but she still felt oddly compelled to see this through to the end. So she took a quick shower, filled a Tupperware with the bourekas, bundled up and drove to the park.

 

Damien was waiting at the entrance as he said, with a duffel slung on one shoulder and an instrument case in his hand. Rose came to a stop in front of him and rolled down her window. “You can just put your stuff in the backseat.” Damien threw in the duffel, then gently placed the case on the floorboard, presumably so that it wouldn’t move around a lot, and got in from the passenger side. Rose started driving.

“Seat belt.”

Damien complied, grumbling and Rose grinned to herself.

“What’s in the case?”

“Violin.”

“Violin? Whose is it?”

“Mine.”

“You play the violin?” Damien nodded. “What? _Who_ are you?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” asked Damien indignantly, a little bit of life coming onto his face.

“Well, no offence but nothing about you screams dedication and hard work. Or musical talent.” she mumbled.

Damien scowled “My parents insisted when I was little. Then I stopped for a while-”

“When they left?”

“Jesus, is there anyone who doesn’t know every fucking detail of my life?”

Rose put up a defensive palm. Damien let out a loud breath through his nose.

“Yes.” he said with a bitter grin. “I stopped when they left. I bounced around a lot, so...”

Rose waited for him to elaborate, though she knew from experience that she wasn’t going to get anything more on the subject. “And now?” she pressed on gently.

“After I got my place… I had a lot of time by myself. And I’ve always loved it, even though I’d complained about it constantly.”

Rose thought about that. About the echoing loneliness of his dreams. The paralyzing terror of them that sometimes followed her around in her waking hours. “You any good?”

Damien smirked. “I’m _very_ good.”

Rose chuckled. “Okay, I’ll take your word for it.”

Damien fiddled with the cuffs of his fingerless gloves, smirk slowly sliding off his face. He hunched in on himself and stared out the window.

When they hit a red light, Rose turned to regard Damien critically. “Have you eaten anything today?”

Damien shrugged. Rose sighed and reached towards the backseat to grab the tupperware. “Here.” She deposited the container onto his lap.

Damien raised an eyebrow. “What’s this?”

“Potato bourekas. They’re Emily’s favorite so I’m taking some to her.” Damien hesitated with his hand on the lid. “You can have as much as you want. I always make too much”

Damien opened the lid, gingerly took out one golden pastry and sniffed it suspiciously. Rose rolled her eyes. The light turned green and she drove on as he took a bite.

“Hey, this is good.”

“I know.”

Damien put the lid back on and drummed his fingers on it. He cleared his throat. “So… Emily likes these, huh?”

“Yeah,” Rose smiled “she had them when she was over for dinner a few weeks ago and she hasn’t stopped talking about them so I thought I’d surprise her.”

Damien nodded. After a beat he asked “You told her?”

“Yes.”

“Wait, really?”

“Yes, Damien. I told her as soon as I left your place last week.”

“Huh.”

Rose shifted uncomfortably. “You’re a total asshole, but you were right. I _was_ hiding. And that’s not who I am. It’s not who I want to be. So I told her.”

“How did she take it?”

“Better than I expected. She had _a lot_ of questions. She-” Rose scratched her forehead. “She wanted to know if I’d ever been in her dreams and I told her I had. She wasn’t happy about that. About me being in her head.”

“No one ever is.”

Rose glanced at Damien. She wanted to tell him that it was not at all the same. She was at least trying to rein it in, to not let it take over everything again. But she had hashed all that out before countless times with her mom, the AM, Dr. Bright, and Emily and she was not keen on going through it again. Especially not with Damien. That seemed like a losing battle. However, there was something that had been eating at her.

“She hasn’t slept with me since.” she blurted.

Damien snorted out a laugh. “Oh?”

“Ugh. That’s not what I mean-” Rose blushed furiously. “You know what? Forget it!”

“Sure.”

Rose huffed. “She’s been sort of kicking me out whenever she gets even a little sleepy.”

“No more cuddles for you, huh?”

“Shut up. She says she just needs some time. And I believe her. So, I’m giving her time.”

Damien let out a little noise from the back of his throat but when Rose looked over at him, his smirk was back in place.

“And you’re bribing her with- what the hell were they called again?”

“Bourekas. And it’s not a bribe. Food is just how I show my love, so you can suck it.”

“Love.”

“I mean, not _love_ love! Just… regular casual everyday love, you know?” She finished lamely.

“Not really.” Damien said, clearly intending to sound amused but it came out pained instead.

They sunk into an uncomfortable silence.

After a while, Rose couldn’t take it anymore. “So, where are you headed?”

“Huh?”

“Which bus are you taking?”

“I don’t know.”

“How do you not know?”

“I’m just going get a ticket to the first bus out of town.”

“Do you have enough money?” Rose asked, hesitantly.

Damien shrugged. “I sold some of my stuff, so I’ll probably be fine for a while.”

Rose hummed doubtfully. She remembered the time when Damien had tagged along on a trip to the farmer’s market and seemed mystified by the price of bananas and had to be dragged away from a shouting match with a vendor about a jar of blueberry jam. Money didn’t really seem like something he’d ever thought about.

“If you say so.” She pulled into a parking spot near the entrance to the bus station. “Well, here we are.”

Damien peered out the window.  “Right.” He moved to undo his seatbelt.

“You think you’ll ever come back?”

Damien’s hand paused on the buckle and for the first time since he got into the car, he looked right at her. “Why? You don’t have to worry. I won’t bother you again. I just called you because I needed a ride. ”

Rose was hurt despite herself. “I told you I’m not worried about that.”

“What, then?”

“I guess I’m going to miss you a bit.”

Damien looked confused.

“I don’t know why, okay? You lied to me. And you’ve done some really messed up stuff. There is an emptiness inside you that scares the shit out of me.” Rose went on, heedless of the grimace on Damien’s face. “I think it scares you too. At least, it’s starting to. And I get that.”

“Really?” Damien asked, sarcastically.

“I’ve been in there, remember?” Rose made an aborted movement to tap his temple but snatched her hand away when he narrowed his eyes at her. She turned her gaze to her lap. “I know what it’s like.” Nope, she was _not_ going there. She shook her head to clear it and tried to capture some semblance of their early camaraderie by needling him a little. “Plus, I kinda feel sorry for you. You’re suffering from a pretty major heartbreak now, I’m guessing. Not that you didn’t deserve it.”

Damien scoffed. “Heartbreak?”

“You screwed up your chances with the guy you’re in love with because you treated him terribly and now he’s happy with someone else.”

“I am not _in love_ with Mark, what the fuck are you talking about?”

“Oh, come on. I’ve felt what you feel. _You_ may not know what it is, but I do.”

Damien threw open the passenger side door and rushed out. Rose got out too. She watched as he got his bag and case out of the backseat and slammed the doors shut.

“Hey!”

“ _Shit!_ ”

Rose walked around the car to get a closer look at Damien’s face and was horrified to discover that his eyes were wet.

“Damien?” She asked in a small voice.

“I’m- I’m _not_.”

“Okay.”

“I don’t-”

Rose placed a palm on Damien’s shoulder.

“ _Shit_.” Damien repeated.

“Yeah.” Rose leaned in a little. “I’m going to hug you now, alright?”

Damien didn’t object, so Rose stepped close and wrapped her arms around him to give him a squeeze. He kept standing awkwardly while Rose patted his back in commiseration. When she stepped away, he sniffed and hurriedly wiped his eyes with the cuffs of his hoodie. He cleared his throat.

“Well, uh, thank you. For giving me a ride.”

“No problem.”

Damien scratched the back of his neck, weirdly reluctant to leave.

“Have a safe trip.” Rose smiled. “And a good rest of your life, I guess. Try to not be such a dick this time around.”

“No promises.”

Rose gave him a stern look. Damien ducked his head, then nodded once to himself and reached into the pocket of his coat. “Here.” He shoved a set of keys in Rose’s hand.

Rose raised her eyebrows at him questioningly.

“They’re the keys for my place.”

“Uh-”

“Just take them. It was too much paperwork for me to sell it and I didn’t want to deal with all that legal stuff-”

“Because you stole it in the first place.”

Damien pressed his lips together.

“And also because technically you don’t exist?” Rose went on.

“Look, the deed is in the apartment somewhere. Do whatever you want with it, I don’t care.”

Rose sighed. “Are you sure about this?”

“Yes. I’m sure.”

“Alright, then.”

“Okay.” Damien tightened his grip on the handle of the violin case. “Goodbye.”

“Goodbye.”

Damien turned abruptly and hurried to the entrance. Rose watched him until he disappeared through the double doors. She gave a long baffled look at the keys in her hand before pocketing them and getting back into her car. It was almost time for her date. She wondered if Emily would be up for a scavenger hunt for some documents in a creepy dude’s house. She hoped the bourekas would at least sweeten the deal.


End file.
